The 1st of 1,000 Steps

A bit about me. I’m not a very nice person, but I’m good with that. It’s been my experience that “nice” can hide plethora of evils. I like that word…plethora…sounds so much better than “a shitload” doesn’t it? But I digress…I’ll be doing that a lot so if stream-of-consciousness isn’t your cup of tea then you should probably stop here. I’ll be jumping around as thoughts pop into my head and begin clearing the cobwebs in my memory warehouse. Like I was saying, I’m not into “nice”. I try instead for good. Good is just, good. It can’t hide evil, because they’re polar opposites. If one isn’t good, they’re evil. I also try to keep things as simple as that. Sure there are grey areas and as I am a human being I’m sure I rationalize that simple philosophy until it’s unrecognizable. However, because being good instead of evil is a pretty simple philosophy to live by, it’s pretty easy to get back to it once I stray. Human beings are all about straying. It’s a part of living. We’re not (and not meant to be) perfect. The thing is once one strays, recognize it, learn from it and then find your way back to your path. All of us humans inherently know the difference between right and wrong. Those concepts are pretty simple and as soon as we reach the Age of Discernment, we know what doing right feels like versus doing wrong. When doing wrong, one must rationalize the reasons. You know, road paved with all those good intentions? That road exists because of our ability to rationalize not only why we do wrong but the reason we NEED to do it. Just my humble opinion. When one is doing right, there’s nothing to rationalize. It feels, right. Again, pretty simple.

Just as simple as treating my fellow bipeds the way in which I want to be treated. Simple.

That said, I’ll be keeping things real here. There’s no sense in writing and sharing a blog like this if I’m not going to be real. Real is simple. I can remember real…most times. Just turned 50 and my memory warehouse needs a “shake ‘n shift” every now and again.

So keeping it real…I’m scared to death…but in a good way. My son and I have been talking/dreaming about this for a few years now and it’s coming to fruition.

We’re relocating from NJ to CO. There’s a lot to do to make this happen and that’s part of the reason for this blog. To document not only the mechanics of the move, but the emotions and anything else of note or interest.

As the plan stands right now:

Upon returning to NJ from a scouting vacation to CO July 25 thru August 8, I lost my wallet. So, I’m in the process of getting a new birth certificate so I can get not only new ID, but also re-apply for my driver’s license. We have to drive ourselves, pets (a cat (Boo) and a ball python (Akasha)) and our meager belongings almost 1,750 miles or so to Colorado Springs, where we plan to establish home base.

We also have 21 years of dust, mess and memories to sift through and pack by the end of September, in order to arrive at our Airbnb location by October 1st. I wasn’t able to find a place to live while previously in CO, so plan B is to move anyway, stay at a hotel or Airbnb and find a job and a domicile within the month of October. Not too tall an order, right?

Why the urgency? I guess this is as good a time as any to share why we feel this move is right, right now. I was downsized from my alma mater where I managed the on-campus theater, at the end of June. Though a jarring experience, it just seemed like the right time to go for it. Sure, the fact that I reached my half-century mark on this planet last September has A LOT to do with this decision. I guess I’m saying that to start all over here in NJ is, from my research and gut feeling, much more difficult than starting all over in CO. Also, there’s a different “feel” to the west compared to the east. That “feel” encompasses so many reasons for this move. But the two aspects of that “feel” come to mind that are more easily verbalized than the others. One: people seem to be more comfortable in their skins. Two: people seem less angry in CO than they do here in the east. As I get older, both of these intangible (but not any less important) aspects are commodities not to be underestimated.

And, yes. There’s also cannabis. I am an ol’ school pot head. I am also a damn good PR/marketing professional. I’m no rocket scientist, but that sounds like a pretty good combination to succeed in the industry, while really helping people. We have the makings of a plan, but that won’t be shared here until it’s time to take it from planning to doing. Sorry, but biz is biz.

A deeper, more real reason for this is carries a “crossroads” component, as well. I was blessed with the gift of being able to sing. I had a clear, precise and beautiful voice that I squandered, thinking it would always be with me. I believe this move and all the possibilities that go along with it is another chance to…

That’s another reason for this blog; to connect something to those dots and create something that is ours. We’ve worked hard for others, since we could work, in order to survive. We think it’s past time to work harder for ourselves, in order to live. I don’t want to leave this existence without having done something. Something not only for myself, but something I can leave for my small family. Something that not only benefits us, but others as well. Something…well, good.

Some would say that my son would fit the bill. First, he’s not a something, he’s a someone. Second, I wasn’t anything but the vessel for his existence. That was God and Nature. And C, He has his own path to follow. I just want to help him give himself a head start. He shouldn’t have to look around at fifty and wonder what he’s done, He should be on his way getting it done and making it better…whatever “it” is. I feel like our kids should not only better than us, but a different better. Not version 2.0, but the sequel that takes place at least a century later and the story line is different because now there’s time travel. I love all kinds of movies, but have a deep fascination with scifi.

So, back to the frantic-ness that will be our lives for the next two months, or so:

I’ve booked the Airbnb. I’m in the process of getting my ID and driver’s license so I can rent a truck to drive the almost 1,800 miles… talk about fear? I don’t like to drive. I am a good driver, however I not only understand road rage, I have experienced it. The first time I had my license, I drove mostly locally. The only real road trip I took was from NY to RI and NJ to NC. Less than a day’s travel. This trip will probably be at least two days travel, but more like three because we have Boo. Also, I’m not trying to break any speed records or get pulled over for speeding through whatever speed traps that exist from here to CO. So, a great deal of my anxiety stems from the actual trip.

Once in CO, the plan is to go straight to the Airbnb, park and let ourselves and the animals rest. Next morning, we drop off our stuff at a storage facility near our home for the month.

Yes, there’s a whole bunch of details I’ve not written here, mostly because I’m still working on them. As they get fleshed out I’ll be sharing them. Hopefully, someone other than myself not only cares about this journey, but is somewhat entertained by it. I’ll also, be sharing any relocation resources I’ve found to be helpful.

That’s it, for now. Have to get back to life, or there’s nothing to share. Positive thoughts and prayers are welcome. Just for your information, I believe in God. But I also believe that humanity makes God small. We attribute both perfection and fallibility to Him and that’s a dichotomy that I can’t build a faith on. I think it’s more of a “force-like” entity and that’s about as far as I’ve gotten. That said, I talk to God all the time. It’s comforting. That’s all I have to say about that.

I quote great screenwriters, too.

Until next time



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